What's in a name?

Now,for once my dear Shakespeare you are absolutely wrong.There is plenty riding on it as I soon found out recently.

It appears that if you have multiple names+multiple surnames+You native place's name annexed to your name it is not very easy guessing what name and what combination will actually turn up in your passport.

I was lucky enough to have single first name and a father who again had a single first name which became my last name.Now dont ask me why my mom's name is not included in my initial or last name.It appears that if you dont have a particular family name(Dutta,Patel,Rao etc) your father's name is automatically super-glued to your name until the Husband factor displaces it(Thanks for the terms Aristotle).

I did ask my mom once why my initial was only S and not S.J.She went off on a rant about how not only the Indian system but the whole world keeps conveniently forgetting women's roles.She kept digressing more and more and then some more and finally when I couldn't nod anymore I got up hurriedly thinking of someplace I had to be.

My next target was paati(grandma).

Me:"Why is my initial only S and not SJ?"

P:That is how it works.My initial had only my father's name until I wed your thaatha.

Me:But why paati?Didnt you protest?Tell them that its unfair.Didnt your mom fight for her rights?.

P:Mom had no time for that.She was very busy.

Me: Doing what?

P:Managing the household,looking after dad and us and most importantly delivering child after child.You know?She delivered 11 children in total.

Me:After that?

P:She died.So you see no time whatsoever.We were either busy trying to save our lives during the World War or studying and cooking that we had no time to ask these questions.

Me:Didnt education want to make you ask questions?

P:No.Andha kaalathla ellam unnoda appa kita nee ippo adam panra maari mudiyadhu.If we have to talk to the menfolk then we make sure there are in a good mood.

Me:And still you stand by your statement that those were the best of times?

P:Yes I am sure.Atleast people were people.Honest.

Me: We are digressing paati.You havent answered my question yet?

P:Yeah yeah.I dont know.It was your parents' decision.Left to them.

Me:That is not an answer.

P:Go ask your Thaatha.

Target 3 -Thaatha.

As I was ascending the staircase I heard the choicest of TamBrahm swear words.It could only mean one of two things if liberal amounts of "shanniyane,kazhutha,kaataila poravane,azhu moonji" were used.Either he was watching a tamil serial or a cricket match.It was a very bad time to aggravate him further.Nevertheless I decided to meet the lion in its den.

Me:Thaatha.

T:Erumma maatu Thaa...*Turns*Oh..Enna?

Me:Oru question.

He looked at me unbelievingly.The look suggested "Since when do you think I started putting out invitations for "Common ask me questions" sessions ?".Nevertheless I continued staring at him till...

T:*Impatiently* Enna?

Me:Why is my initial only S and not SJ?

T:Eh?What does J stand for? Ethavdhu TV la dance aadra pudhu Shanniyanna?

Me: Illa.Amma peru.

T:Unga amma peru Chitra dhaane?

Me:illa.Official name vera.

He looked like he couldn't care less.

Me:Sollu thaatha.

T:Ummmmm,errrr...Therile di.Poi paatiya kelu.

Me:Ketachu.

T:Amma?

Me:Ketachu.

T:Appa?

Me:Innum illa.

T:*Sensing the escape route* Appa va poi kettuko.Enna ippo TV paaka vidu.

I sensed a lost battle.As I turned to leave the Tv was un-muted and there were screams of "Shanniyane" that filled the room.

Target 4-Appa.

Me:Appa.

A:Ey..Veedu poora kuppa potruka.Poruppe ille.

Me:Wait wait.I want to ask you something

A:Enna?

Me:Why is my initial only S and not SJ?

A:*Same expression of disbelief* Office la irundu vanda odane loosu thanama kelvi ketu uyira vaangadha.

Me:Sollu pa.

A:Adhelam theryadhu di.My initial is only S and not SA.Your mom's was S and not SK.Your sister's is not SJ but S.Dont question all this.This how it is.

Me:But Aishu's is PG no?

A:So?

Me:So why is mine not SJ?

A:What difference does it make? Ennoda peraye nee full eluda maate.SundarRam le first half eh cut pannitu style ah Ram nu poda vendyudhu.Idhule Amma per en illanu 10000 kelvi vera.Podi.

Me:But...

*Phone rings* Appa senses chance

Appa:Ey Business call disturb pannadhe.

Goes to the side.I listen on...

Appa:*on the phone*Ah sollu Baalu.Next week dhaane Fox Hunt?No problem.Lunch ku Veg Biriyani solidalam.

I sighed.Hopelessly.

Lessons learnt.

When you question an age-old tradition

1)All women go on a rant about how they were suppressed "andha kaalathla" and ask you to be thankful that you can talk back to your elders.If she is also your grandma she might add subtle hints about how your dad and mom are giving you too much freedom by allowing you to ask questions.

2)All men stare at you in disbelief.Not because of the question you raised.The expression is more likely "Why me?" .They shrug and nod and go do their work.If you pester them they point out that you haven't done your daily duties either and expect that guilt should stop you from asking questions.

So,Shakespeare there is a lot riding on a name.

Until the next one,

Gaya :)